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Chevy
Cheapest Heap Ever enVisioned Yet
Car Has Extensive Valve Rattle On Long Extended Trips
Chrysler
Car Having Really Yucky Stupid Lazy Engine Runs
Could Have Remained Your Sickly Lame Elderly Relative's
Citroen
Crummy Interior, Terrible Road-holding, Owned Entirely by Nebishes
Dodge
Dead Or Dying Garbage
Emitter
Drips Oil, Drops
Grease, Everywhere
Dem Old Dudes Go
Everywhere
Dangerous On Days
Gears Engage
Death Overcomes
Driver's Generous Ego
Damn Old Dirty Gas
Eater
Fiat
Failure in Automotive
Technology
Feeble Italian Attempt
at Transportation
Fix It Again Tony?
Fix It All the Time
Ford
First On Recall
Day
First on race day
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found on road dead
Fraternal Order
of Restored DeSoto's
For Only Redneck
Drivers
(backwards) Driver
Returns On Foot
Fault Of R&D
Fast Only Rolling
Downhill
F.O.R.D.=Found On
Rubbish Dumps (Submitted by Martin Malpass)
GMC
Garage Man's Companion
Generally Mediocre
Cars
Get More Chicks
Got Mechanic Coming
Generally Made Crappy
(Submitted by Steven Bissonnette)
Honda
How Odd, No Damn
Acceleration
Hold Overs Not Doing
Anything
Hell Of a Nice Damn
Automobile
Hyundai
Hope You Understand
Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive...
Jaguar
Junk Always Going
Under At Repair Shop
Jeep
Junk Electrical
and Emissions Parts
Jump Excitedly in
Every Pothole
Junk Everyone Eyes
for Parts
Jinxed Engine has
Extra Parts
Jumps Everything
Ever Parked
JUST Enough Engine
Power?
Jr. Engineered Every
Part
Mazda
Model All Zoids
Drive Aimlessly
Making A Zillion
Dollars Annually
Mercedes
Most Every Red Cent
Eventually Dissipates, Extinguishing Savings
Mercury
Mileage Eventually
Ruins Car -- Usually Ruins You
Makes Everyone Really
Crave Underpowered, Recalled Yugo
Makes Envisioning
REAL Car Understandable -- Recalled Yet?
Motorists Easily
Rate Car (Usually "Real Yo-yo")
Mopar
Most Often Passed
At Races
Mostly Old Parts
And Rust
Mostly Old Paint
And Rust
Mitsubishi's Over
Priced American Replicas
My Old Plymouth
Ain't Runnin' (Submitted by Randy Vandraiss)
Made Of Plastic
And Rust (Submitted by Mark)
Nissan
Never In Synch Screeching
Awful Noises
Needs Imminent Salvage
So Abandon Now
Oldsmobile
Oh Look, Dammit,
Some Massive Oil Burning Idiot's Leaking Everything
Old Loose Dented
Sheet Metal Outdated By Infamies Like Edsel
Old Ladies Driving
Slow making Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everyday
Overpriced, Leisurely
Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment
Pinto
Put In New Transmission
Often
Plymouth
Please Let Your
Mother Out Under The Hood!
Pontiac
Poor Old Nitwit
Thinks Its A Cadilliac
Porsche
Puts Out Really
Smoky Carbonate Hazardous Emissions
Phased Out Racer-Still
Can't Hold Engine
Please Overlook
Really Smutty Cardboard Horrible Engine
Pulled Over Regularly
So Cops Have Enough
Rabbit
Replace A Beetle?
Boy, It Tried
Racy? Ain't! Bouncy,
Bad Itty-bitty Toy!
Renault
Retarded Engine,
No Acceleration, Ugly Lump of Trash
Saab
Swedish Automobile
- Always Broken
Send Another Automobile
Back
Sable
Sleezy Auto Brakes
Leak Everytime
Toyota
Taking Our Yen Out
-- Thanks All
Too Often Yankees
Overprice This Auto
Triumph
The Risk Involving
Useless Machinery Pays Heavily
Trembling Ride,
Intrusive Undercarriage, Meekly Powered Hotrod.
Vanagon
Via Another Name:
A Go-cart On Nerve
Volkswagen
Vehicle Owner's
List: Kite String, Wire, Aluminum, Gum, Engine (NOT!)
Volvo
Very Odd Looking
Vehicular Object
VW
Very Worthless |
